An eventful trip
I nearly died.. nearly died in Aur..

cuz i didnt turn the knob correctly resulting in my lack of oxygen under water.. has it not been for Lawrence who was my buddy.. i seriously think i would have drowned and just died.. who could have known what was wrong.. after that, he also told me it was trial and error one.. hahhahah.. with no language, only hand signals.. who could have known.. i was having difficulty breathing then i start to signal nonsense signals.. thank God i didnt panick and shoot all the way up to the surface.. i wonder if i would have suffered brain damage if that was the case.. it was super dangerous cuz it was at Rayner's Rock that it happened.. if its Sebukang Bay, i think it would have been better.. i think.. Rayner's Rock has strong currents coming from all directions.. all the divers were lost, separated our ways cuz of my accident.. terrible.. thank God that everyone was ok or else i will be blaming myself all the way..

after this incident, i m very shocked.. shocked to realise how dangerous it was.. and how precious life is.. how lawrence was my buddy.. a good thing i would say.. really.. how fiona xie was acting in the show "Champion".. :D

well all things are well now..

today is my mother's bdae.. :D we went to eat at the revolving restaurant just now.. the food was ok.. sad to say.. hhahahhahah.. but at least got salmon... loads and loads of salmon.. wheeeeee... my fav.. :D nice nice.. plus i think i enjoyed the salad the most.. cuz its the nicest food there.. oh ya and the mee siam.. its suppose to be buffet.. i m still bloated from the lunch.. hahhaha.. :D



happiness?
well.. i m really happy now.. really happy.. think i have found my life back.. back with no strings attached..

i realise i liked freedom.. i think i m fickle minded.. i used to pray to God asking stoopid things like "hey, i m so bored.. can i just have someone to like me? and start sth?" like super desperate right.. i had always think relationships give me a sense of control.. well, tt is a stoopid thought.. probably its time to grow up.. hahhaha..

in life, u dun really make a lot of close frens.. frens whom u can trust yr life with.. in fact, i dun have.. i have gd frens.. frens who can do girl talk.. who can talk rubbish and crap with.. but someone to share the innermost secrets.. none.. sadly.. but its still great to have frens with whom u can go out late at night and just sit there doing nothing.. hahhahah.. i miss my sec school frens..

so talking abt freedom.. plus i nv really like relationships.. i guess.. esp when uni life is suppose to be exciting.. except for the times i sit in the canteen alone eating lunch.. so pathetic.. except for the times i go to lessons alone.. my counsellors say frens get fewer when u get older.. i guess tt is so true.. oh dear.. tt is scary then.. i better know more ppl.. hahhahhaa..

one of my frens not very happy.. telling me abt low self-esteem and no frens.. makes me think of how i use to think tt very often.. hmmm.. ppl out there, dun u all think tt way most of the time too.. i mean who doesnt fear of losing frens at moments even if u seem super popular.. hmmm.. i mean really, u fear whether ppl like u cos u are popular or for who u are.. or maybe ppl like u cos u are pretty or handsome, yet not who u r.. so sad right..

so its difficult.. but i guess i will take up the challenge.. to fight this battle well.. hopefully.. plus encourage more ppl too.. hols are beginning to look gd.. esp when its going to be diving tmr... wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.......... dun be jealous, ppl.. hhahhahah...



diving soon...
wheee... guess it will be quite shiok to go diving again after such a long break.. :D

it will be fun.. yay.. plus more acting and stuff on the island.. lol.. in preparation for the dive camp in july.. wheee..

yupz.. and i will be away from 23 to 27 june.. wah.. that is long right.. definitely will be super shiok.. in that pretty island.. and resting.. and diving.. and just dreaming.. lol..

upcoming parents' day in churchy has quite a number of stuff to do.. hope it runs well.. pray that God will take care of it.. :)



lalala
Today's event of the day: SMSS's E-life cum AmazingRace

I had really great bringing the groups from place to place playing games and stuff. It was really enriching to see them play and work together which has been lost touch by now for me.. hahaha.. but it was great that.. God had made an impact to them.. :D

Dinner at the table...
my mother is so so so childish.. loook.. i was just getting my potatoes from the table when her sticky chopsticks touched my hand plus she doesnt bother to say sorry.. so i said " at least you could have said sorry" and u know what she said.. urgh.. oh i wanted to say sorry but u showed that kind of face, that is why i dun wan to say already.. wah.. if not hor, i will really go right up to her and smack her in the face.. so "urgh".. haiz.. my mother is super "cannot grow big"..

my grandma not feeling very gd everytime she had to take her medicine.. she loses her appetite.. bet my mother dun even care.. poor grandma.. boohoo.. her stoopid daughter is so irritating.. no appetite.. so wat shld i do.. how to increase the appetite of a diabetes lady.. hmmm.. sour plum.. any suggestions out there? :D



back from re-treat
yay.. i m back.. refreshed.. regenerated with the passion to be like Christ.. to walk right with God.. :D

maybe its hard.. its hard to be like holy moly.. and its said to be "uncool".. but i guess its worth it.. worth it if God has been blessing me so much..

even thru times of sadness and depression, i was really glad tt God has been watching over me.. probably i really just need to reflect more and more.. its great that the hols are here.. a great way for me to find back what i have lost.. ever since uni life started.. where is God in my life? I need to find it back.. for GOOD!!!



life back at church..
it was great! nice to be back in jym and stuff after all the exams and stuff.. plus playing keyboard for service.. glad tt david put me in for keyboard.. hahhaha..

it was really great.. we had a very fun practise.. plus loads of laughing at each other.. plus david's corniness, gabriel's lame jokes, claudia's nice voice, ivan's beautiful playing, ryan's blurness, jesse's "hahaha", justin's "stern" look.. lol.. it was fun.. hahahaha..

today's service, i manage to play the solo part well enough.. lol.. yay!!! it paid off.. thank God for the many blessings that he has shown me today.. even though i was depressed.. it was great to be "back" in church.. doesnt mean i wasnt ard.. it just means being able to feel connected again.. :D didnt really think i played well today.. plus the numerous mistakes tt i make.. cuz i keep playing the wrong key.. bad sense of hearing.. lol..

nice nice comments to take note..
jx(during debrief): wah.. i heard wy played so well until i almost missed the starting line which i was supposed to sing.. during prac, wy was trying so hard to prac tt solo part then it went really well.. (lol.. i didnt expect tt.. but tt was really nice.. if not for the prac at home plus during prac)
--> although sad to say.. actually technicalities does not really matter much.. but i was happy tt at least i did my best in wat i do for God.. or else it will just be plain playing.. even though notes may be beautiful.. but the heart not there also no pt.. :D

maggie: i enjoyed yr playing today.. tt was really nice.. n u were singing.. :D (tt was a really nice comment too..)
--> actually i have singing all along.. but actually i think i was trying too hard to make sure i dun play the wrong key and stuff.. ended my singing were in a mess.. glad tt she didnt discover it.. wahhahah...

jesse: hey.. yr playing really improved ar.. can see tt you can follow the band already.. :D
--> i really liked this comment too.. cuz at least my playing improved instead of disproved..

sometimes in one day, u can receive a bombard of nice comments while some days, u get none.. but its indeed great to have some.. lol.. it really made my day.. since i was not really happy these days.. also dunno why.. but i was really jubilant today, playing in church and stuff.. :D

its really the "unspeakable joy".. i love playing with the band.. yay!!!



reflective mood
ever since exams ended, life has become boring..

arguments over the dinner table by my mum and dad.. then i just wondered, why is mum so irritating yet dad still tolerated her.. impressed? or amused?

relationships come and go.. dun they..

it has been long.. ever since i got into relationships.. serious? not serious? short ones? long ones? anyhow ones? sometimes u really feel u had to take a break.. really.. exhausted.. depressed..

still depressed.. sometimes u wonder.. who do u really love? the one who will be with u for the rest of yr life aka get married and have kids.. or the one whom u only knew for a short while.. i always wonder.. will u really love the person the most with whom u get married to? i really wonder.. of cos commitment is impt in a marriage.. but then doesnt mean u wont be committed even if u dun love the person.. its more of "i want to stay committed cuz I got no choice?" haiz.. dunno.. i wonder if tt was what happened to my parents.. ha.. really.. i m not jokin..

i always find it a miracle.. how 2 ppl can stay together for the rest of their lives and not change partners.. obviously men do cheat.. n they always do.. hahha.. :D rights, so those who really stay true, i m impressed..

well, i must be too bored just thinking abt all these stuff.. is starting to make me depressed.. weird..

anyway i m going out later.. tt will be gd.. :D

i wonder if its the rain.. somehow rainy seasons make me ponder more and feel sad.. ... ... ...



papers over!!!
wheeee... free.. ??hmmm.. i wonder if i m so free after all..

i did not like the others, "fly" to somewhere to enjoy themselves or wat.. but i prefered the comforts of home.. just resting at home is gd enough.. shiok enough.. lol..

actually i have a boring life hor.. wahahahhaha..tt is not the pt.. papers ended.. tt is gd.. :D

i m quite satisfied with myself for clearing up the cupboards.. no one forced me.. i actually did it willingly... seriously, tt is a miracle.. must be the state my maid is in.. gives me the reason to clean up my room even more.. weird.. they are as gd as new now.. so clean and filled with textbooks were used last sem.. dotz.. hahhaha.. haven gotten new books yet la.. guess its not the right time to pack my cupboards.. "BIG dotz"



water supply
the water supply was not available in the bathroom.. cuz my maid did sth again.. wat is wrong with the maid.. bathe with downstairs toilet also can caused the tap to spoil.. and we had to switch off the main.. plus my dad had to rush back to check and see whether things are alright.. the other time our house bicycle got stolen n it was supposed to be locked.. who is she kidding..

ah well.. ever since she came.. a lot of things went berserk.. the termites, the bicycle, the water supply.. plus all the desks, corners and stuff which she doesnt pack and clean up.. wat is tt maid for.. seriously i can do without it.. or can i? pampered girl.. urgh..



dad lost..
it was the usual dinner we had at home.. usual? hahah.. its funnier than ever.. it was great.. :D

witnessed it myself to catch the funniest moments in my family.. love them lots.. dinner, the usual ppl: mum dad chong min n me.. :D there we were chatting n chatting.. talking abt everything under the sun.. aka the maid's laziness: not any better than our old maid, sukani.. to think i even get to mention abt my maids online.. tt is a miracle.. hahah.. den there was the weather, the termites tt infested my house n den my father had to fight the termite trial case via the court...

then it came to the part abt bathing.. how my little sis, min had managed to overcome the cold, freezing water.. hahahha.. cuz of the hot weather, she claims.. den my sis, chong was like quite afraid of the cold water.. so my father swiftly took up the "mike" and started saying abt how good it is to bathe in and etc (actually he is mindful of the cost the heater has been getting into the bills, wahahhaha) den my mum was like "不知道谁在厕所里面 augh argh argh 叫"... my father was like so embarassed.. den he just shook his head and laughed.. like "你在讲谁..." lol.. den i burst out laughing.. u shld have seen my father's face.. so corny.. bahahahahah..

rmb the salesman tt was my cousin.. he managed to con my mother into buying "some magnetic bed sheet" tt initially my father claimed tt it really worked for him.. it lessened his old and cranky bones' pain.. den when my mother approached him whether it worked for him in the face of the salesmen.. my father denied.. den my mother was explaining all these and ended saying "kanasai" den my father n mother started this funny, cute light quarrel.. den my father kept shaking his head..

its funny la.. probably u all dun get it.. but its always fun to have family dinners esp when my father is the joker and the joke itself.. wahahhahha... :D