realisation of the matters of heart and God..
sometimes i wonder if i placed too much time thinking about Joshua rather on God.. i think it has always been chucked in the back of my head.. i do not want to think or just keep shouting "SHUT UP!!!" to God.. haiz.. bad..

i wonder how much i have drifted away.. i thank God for giving the best memories of my life - joshua.. even if it was short-lived, i m grateful.. so strange.. although it was miserable.. but the joyfulness springs from the moment i knew him.. so the rest doesnt matter.. even if he hated me alot.. i guess tt's life isnt it.. i have to learn somehow someday n know tt prob one day, he will know.. maybe.. my hope is not on him but on God.. and in tt, i m very certain.. "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28. reminded of this verse makes me realise tt i should stop sinning.. must get a grip on myself..

being a christian is nv an easy thing-- as my pastor mentioned to me just now.. me, being a cell leader cannot even get my group together.. struggle at every single step.. i dun feel i m contributing esp when most of my time is spent thinking about where is the next diving trip.. ha.. i still love God.. i nv want to be in a situation where i compromise.. but diving makes me do tt.. urgh.. i seriously need to pray.. slacker.. haiz..

my life is going thru transitional mode.. today, went for the Anglican Youth Leaders Network (AYLN) thingy.. met my SERVE frens.. realise tt their lifes are filled with serving God.. makes me really think m i contributing.. not tt i want to outperform or anything.. but "faith without deeds is dead" in Hebrews.. so u know.. deeds..

i love my family.. i still love joshua.. n most imptly, i love God.. i feel blessed.. :D joyfulness springs from a heart which looks towards God.. yes.. hopefully the next time i blog in, i will write some improvements i have made.. ha..

exams are just abt the corner.. urgh.. ha..

So do you wanna know more about the person who created this blogskin? by detail? check out.

The title had crossed my mind to do an entry because there's a question from variety peoples always asked the same things. I collected the questions since i was a small kids until now. The "question" is always same. So, i would like to share it with you. I also include about my blog k.

Your blog is really nice, how did you do that?
Actually, i always change my theme because i am a person who havva very quick feeling of boredom. I cannot make things permanently -certain. I was at random when viewing others people blog on tumblr. I said T U M B L R only. So if their theme makes me attracted, i will make them as inspiration. Tadaa!

You looked pretty, are you mixed blood?
Haha. Yes I am (and i wonder how they know i was ‚ñß.‚ñ® ). People notice that by looking at my face (totally) and the way i talked?? LOL. Okay, my late grandfather (beside my father) is a Thai. His family comes from Pattani, Thailand. But then my grandfather's family move to Malaysia because of several problem. My grandpa is a pure Thai,, naahh.. no wonder i love thai foods so much while my sister love to watch Thai's movies. Furthermore, my late grandfather (beside my mom) is Java people. Pure also. About his family background, they came to Malaysia to trade -Business :P

Why did your nose had a freckles?
This question is always asked by people since i was a small kids. Got answer above, i stated all there. Im mixed. stfu.

What kind of products did you use?
Hah this question lagi laa... Actually my face wasnt a flawless like a baby's skin. I do had a pimple problem when i was thirteen years old, but now not again. I just use the face cleanser -Shurah. and Mycin to prevent the pimple. Its pretty good.

What's the brand of cosmetics that you used?
For skins, i used Simply Siti. It's much better and very soft. Others like eyeshadow, lipstick, eyeliner, mascara and etc, i used L'elan Vital, include Simply Siti too.

What is you real name? and your real name is better than Lala. Why did you change that? ...........Five years ago, -at class. Me: What do you think about a nickname? Any suggestion? Classmate: Your name A-dil-la. So how bout we're take the last term. "LA" (doubled 'em) Me: Lala?? Haha.. oh yah sure. I like it so much. Classmate: But Didi also okay Me: Nooo.. it sound like a boy's name ! Me: Okay okay.. Call me Lala start from now

Got it? Five years ago, no one named "Lala" in my school (SMK Rawang) but nowaday, double middle fingers up to them. I hate when people's nickname same as me. Grr! Certain people didnt know my real name. They know me as Lala :3 I dont use my real name because people always get wrong when spelling my name. I hate that. Just Lala okay.. Dilla (my real name) is only for family called and friends from ex-SK Taman Selasih.

Are you a die hard fans of pink?
Definitely!

----P/s : Maybe thats all. You can ask me on formspring. ‚ô´ Fiction....fiction... by Beast.

-Please remove this nonsense. It was just an example.

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